bitter sweet remedy
by hgfan16
Summary: After the rebellion Johanna moves to d2 where she meets Gale she knows him a bit from d13 but they had never really met. At some point they fell for each other.But with each fighting their own inner demons (fears and guilt) they'll have to fix each other before they get a happily ever after.takes place a year after the rebellion(will flash back to when they met and stuff)
1. Chapter 1

**i always liked the idea that Johanna and Gale ended up together after everything was all said and done because by the end of mockingjay they were both broken on the inside gale, with Katniss hating him and the whole prim and the bomb thing that he'll have to remember for the rest of his life and Johanna with her fear of water from her torture from the Capital so i decided to write a story about them trying to fix eachother and finally getting their own happily ever after...kinda. P.S. i own nothing**

**Summary:****After the rebellion Johanna moves to d2 where she meets Gale she knows him a bit from her time in d13 but they had never really met. At some point they sort of fell for each with each fighting their own inner demons Johanna's being her fear of water and her memories of her time in the Capital and Gale's being the guilt of what the bomb he built did. they'll have to fix each other before they get a happily ever after. it takes place a year after the rebellion(will flash back to when they met and other stuff)**

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She woke up shrieking and crying then cursed herself for being weak. He rolled over and held her but she shoved him off then stormed into the bathroom muttering to herself. She slammed the door shut and slid her body down the wall and hugged her knees as she cried silently. He sat there confused. After a few minutes he could hear her scolding herself in the bathroom.

"You are Johanna freaking Mason! Pull yourself together! Nothing hurts you. NOTHING. Don't let them win. Don't be weak." She repeated like a mantra.

He heaved himself off the bed still groggy from sleep and made his way over to the bathroom door, he knocked quietly. He heard her gasp and then the rumpling of fabric letting him know she had gotten up off the floor. He heard the water in the sink turn on and her sharp intake of breath but he didn't hear the disturbance in the water letting him know she hadn't actually touched the water. It was something she did a lot since the rebellion, turn on the water but never actually touch it, he wasn't quite sure why.

"Gale you should probably go home." She muttered from the other side of the door. He sighed. This happened sometime, whenever she decided to shut him out. It had been nearly a year since the rebellion and she had yet to tell him what the capital did to her. She also refused to let him see her cry. When he first met her he didn't think she did. He thought she was the toughest girl on the planet and nothing could break her. Then one day something snapped and he saw the fragile scared girl the capital had made her into. He would spend hours on end trying to figure out what had happened that day that had caused the change but no matter how hard he tried he couldn't think of anything out of the ordinary, it had simply been a nice rainy day in district 2.

"Ok Jo, but I'll be back in the morning to take you to Annie's baby shower." He was almost out the front door when the bathroom door creaked open slowly and a slightly more composed Johanna stood playing with her hands.

"Don't go" she barely whispered. He smiled usually she'd let him leave, which is why he kept his apartment in the first place. For the days she shut him out and kicked him out. He headed back to her taking her into his arms. She shifted a little, still uncomfortable with the cuddly types of things having never been one of the girls that liked that kind of thing, but she didn't tell him off either. She had given up on that months ago, instead she just leaned into him and sighed. She closed her eyes and they stood there in silence for a while till Johanna was nearly falling asleep standing up, then Gale led them back to the bed and laid them down. She was almost asleep when he spoke up,

"Was it the same nightmare again?"

"Yes"

And with that they fell asleep.

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	2. Chapter 2

**I own nothing!**

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Gale woke her up the next morning once he was dressed in his suit for the baby shower.

"Come on Jo, we have to get going so you need to get dressed."

Johanna rolled over and brought her knees up to her chest, hugging them.

"I'm not going" she said and hid her face in her knees as if she was afraid he'd yell.

"Are you sick?" he asked worried that since she was laying in the fetal position she might be ill with the flu or something.

"No" Johanna mumbled. Gale furrowed his eyebrows in confusion.

"Then what's wrong?"

"Nothing, nothing's wrong I'm just not going that's all" Gale frowned.

"Jo one of your best friends had a baby, you should be there for the baby shower. "

"No, it's in district for 4, I'm not going. Besides the baby was born 2 months ago, if she really wanted me to see it she would have brought it here."

"So that's what this is about? You feel left out because Annie didn't bother to bring the baby here? You know how hard it is to bring newborns travelling Jo and besides even if she had…"

"No, that's not it, I'm not going to district 4 so just drop it." She interrupted him blankly her voice void of emotion.

"Is this about Finn? I thought we've been over this Jo, yes Finn died and it was tragic but he wouldn't want you moping around all the time and he would want you to go to the baby shower for his son. "

"THIS ISN'T ABOUT FINN" she yelled." And well yes it would be hard to face a baby that looks exactly like him, that's not why I'm not going, I'm just not ok? I'm happy where I am and if Annie wants to show me her damn baby so bad then she can come here and I'll buy her a gift while she's here."

"So you don't want to go because you haven't bought her a present yet?"

"Of course I've bought her a present it's in the cupboard and you can bring it to her when you go to the baby shower now go, you're going to miss your train. "

"Johanna you are coming to this baby shower!"

"No I'm not and you can't make me!"

Gale just smirked and rolled his eyes then he threw her over his shoulder grabbed her dress hair brush and present and walked out the front door and to the train station. He didn't let her down until they were on the train and the train was moving. He carefully placed her on her feet and handed her, her dress. He then backed a good foot and a half backwards knowing full well that she was pissed. But instead of yelling she simply muttered "you forgot my shoes" and pushed past him into one of the bathrooms to get changed. When she re-emerged she was wearing a beautiful flowy floral dress and a scowl. But yet again she didn't yell she just silently took her seat next to Gale and stared at the floor. Gale was beginning to worry because normally Johanna would be excited to see Annie and normally Johanna would chew him out for not doing as she wanted. But today she was silent and not a word was said from her in their 5 hour train ride to district 4, even though Gale tried numerous times to make conversation she just stared at the floor as if she couldn't hear him at all. Eventually the train arrived in district 4 and Johanna silently rose and trailed after Gale. As they were reaching Annie's beach side manor Johanna tried to put on a happy smile but it didn't reach her eyes. Gale also noticed that she made a point to walk on his side farthest away from the water. He took a second to wonder why but then shook it off as a coincidence. When they reached Annie's door they knocked and a smiling Annie opened the door.

"Johanna!" she squealed embracing the girl Johanna laughed slightly

"I missed you too Ann"

Annie ushered them inside. Johanna followed Annie until she realized that Gale was frozen in the doorway. She turned around and gave him a questioning glance but he didn't see it. She followed his petrified stare and saw Katniss. Johanna quickly went back to Gale and pulled on his arm but he didn't move,

"I shouldn't be here. " He muttered.

"You were just as invited as I was." Johanna whispered.

"I can't face her Jo, not after what I've done." Jo raised an eyebrow

"What have you done?"

"I built the bomb, the one that killed her sister. It was my fault." He muttered." It was my fault."

Johanna shook her head and pulled Gale outside motioning to Annie that they needed a minute.

"That's why you moved to district 2 wasn't it?" he nodded

"I can't face her." He whispered." I can't, not after what I've done"

"Snap out of it Gale you haven't done anything, it wasn't your fault." He covered his ears, shut his eyes and shook his head refusing to believe her words. Johanna slowly took his hands in hers removing them from his ears.

"Did you know what they were going to do with your bombs?"

"I knew the jist of it but I wasn't told all of the plan."

"Did you know Prim was being put on the front line?"

"No"

"Did you plan on killing Prim or any of the rebels with your bombs?"

"No"

"Then it wasn't your fault, if anything it was president Coins fault for deciding to kill our own in order to win the war, it was her fault for putting Prim on the front line, and if you ask me she did it on purpose to try to weaken Katniss, I think she was hoping Katniss would believe the Capital had bombed them again and the Capital had killed Prim so that Katniss would for sure kill Snow I think she knew that Katniss wanted her dead too." Johanna stated matter of factly, Gale stared at her blankly for a few minutes then nodded slightly, he didn't believe it fully but it was a start and Johanna's theory made sense. Johanna leaned up and kissed his cheek before taking his hand and leading him back inside.

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	3. Chapter 3

**I own nothing**

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The baby shower went on in a frill of snacks and laughter. As the sun began to go down the party moved outside and a big bonfire was set. Lots of people ran in and out of the water while others danced and sang around the fire. Gale was one of the people who opted for swimming as it was a hot and humid day. But after several minutes he realised that he hadn't seen Johanna since the party moved outside. He took a second to look around and couldn't see her anywhere. Then he saw her sitting in the corner of the porch. He walked out of the water and ran up to her.

"Come on Jo, come have fun"

"No thanks, I'm good" Gale rolled his eyes. It was just like her to be a party pooper. So he did the logical thing that any boyfriend would do, he flung her over his shoulder and headed towards the water. Johanna thrashed around kicking and screaming and punching any part of Gale she could reach and the closer to the water they got the harder she kicked and the louder she screamed, but no one thought anything of it because this was a natural reaction from a girl about to be dunked. But this wasn't a normal reaction, it was full blown fear. She could feel her heartbeat pounding in her ears and pain in every inch of her body as flashbacks of her torture in the capital flashed before her eyes and against her better judgement she began to sob. Her whole body went still and her expression went blank as tears rolled down her face and onto Gale's back. It was only then as she rests inches above the water that Gale stopped, taken aback by her mood change.

"Please just take me back to the porch" she rasps through her sobs, her voice quiet. He nodded and changed how he was holding her so that he was carrying her bridal style. She wrapped her arms around his neck and hid her face in his chest, silently crying. When they reached the porch he sat down gently and pulled her into his lap.

"I'm sorry" he whispered. She just stared silently out at the sea. He could see her flinch slightly with every wave that hit the shore, shrinking back slightly in fear. He didn't say anything, he just waited. 5 minutes passed, then 10, then an hour and Johanna continued to stare at the waves.

"Jo, I" he began but she cut him off.

"That's how they did it." She said without turning away from the sea.

"Did what?"

"That's how the capital tortured me, with water and electricity…."

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	4. Chapter 4

**i own nothing**

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"Jo, I'm sorry, I didn't know"

"I know"

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"It's hard to talk about, and I didn't want to be seen as weak."

"Johanna, you are the farthest thing from weak, you are the strongest person I know, you've been through so much and you are still here." Johanna smiled at him slightly then turned back to look at the sea.

"Don't you want to talk about it?" he asks. She shakes her head.

"Not yet" she whispers. He nods and stands up. The he holds out his hand, she smiles and takes it and they head over to the bonfire.

….

It's on the train ride home at 4 in the morning that Johanna finally speaks up.

"They'd soak me in water from head to toe. I was chained to my chair so I couldn't move as they drenched my in bucket after bucket of freezing cold water."

"Jo, it's ok, you don't have to…" she shook her head.

"If I don't say it now, I never will. So just let me finish." He nodded.

"They'd soak me all over, everything but my head, they'd always save that for last because instead of throwing water at my head they'd dunk my head into the bucket, they'd hold my head down so long that my lungs burned but they'd never let me pass out, not at that part. Once I was wet they'd attach wires all over my body and turn on the electricity. Every nerve in my body would feel like it was on fire. I'd scream but no one that cared could hear me, sometimes I believed no one cared at all, that maybe this was karma for all the kids I killed. Eventually I stopped screaming, not because it stopped hurting but because I didn't have the energy anymore. Sometimes I'd pass out, sometimes I'd have seizures and sometimes my heart would stop, but the doctors, they wouldn't let me die, no they needed the information. I never gave in to them. They didn't like that, I died 12 times while I was there. Every day I wished they would've let me stay dead. I wished just one time they wouldn't of been able to save me so I wouldn't have to wake up and have it start all over again."

Johanna's voice was shaking and so was her body, gale took her into his arms but stayed silent so she could finish.

"And it sucked, knowing there was one word that was keeping me alive. If I just said 13, it could all just stopped. But I wanted the rebellion so bad. I wanted them all to pay, I wanted it to be at my hand that they fell, after everything they did and everyone I lost, I just wanted to win for once. So instead I said 'down with the president' and they turned the voltage up by 10% and added a third shocking per day. And it sucked because when you guys came and rescued us I couldn't get over the memories and my fear of water and I tried so hard to be ready for the war I wanted it so bad and I didn't even get to fight. They kept me locked in a dorm in district 13, I pounded on those doors until my hands bled and when they finally let me out they told me the war was over and both the presidents were dead. I sat there awhile, and I knew I should be happy but all I could think was what now? Everything I had fought my whole life for had been accomplished and I missed all of it, and quite frankly I didn't know what to do with myself. I didn't know where to go. I couldn't stand being underground any longer so staying in 13 was out otherwise I'd go insane. I couldn't go back to seven not after everything, not when everything there reminded me of those I lost and the victors village would haunt me forever reminding me of the things I had done. I couldn't move to the capital and have to see all the people snow had sold my body to. 12 was out because the mocking jay and bread boy's love fest made me sick. 4 was a no, there was way too much water when I heard Finn had died, I couldn't bring myself to face Annie, or the child that would look just like him, Finn had been the only thing I had left the only thing that kept me strong and I know I always said there was no one left that I loved but Finn was like a brother to me, he made me feel like I wasn't a monster because if someone like Finn could still stand to be around me then I couldn't be that bad. And I had to pretend not to care about him because anyone I was ever close to ended up dead, and he ended up dead anyways. At that point I would take the capital or even 7 over going to 4. I couldn't go to 1, I killed both the kids from there in my first games. Then I heard they were sending you to 2 and well, you were pretty much the only one that I could stand being around and Paylor offered me a job and it just seemed like the best place for me at the time so I hopped on the first train to district 2 and well you know the rest."

He was in shock for a second and then held her tighter to himself and whipped away the tears she wasn't aware she had shed.

"I won't let anyone hurt you ever again."

"I know"

They didn't let go of each other until the train reached 2 but even then their hands stayed clasped together.

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**Please review! Thanks for reading:)**


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